Proverbial

(My PMS has broken into its more severe form, PMDD. Don't be surprised to find this long rant either deleted or drastically edited in the next few days - THEN AGAIN, MAYBE NOT)

Ask either of my parents how I was as a kid and they'd probably tell you I was(!) the female counterpart of Dennis the Menace (see, even my old photo shows that menacing grin lol). I got into a lot of catfights and fistfights, and yes I was very, very naughty. Let's see, I knocked off my sister Coco's tooth on two separate occasions (and was punished severely for both incidents), I smacked a classmate's head with a soda bottle when I was in 4th grade for he was constantly teasing and making fun of me (he was fine and I was penalized which I so rightfully deserved), I managed to wreck one of my parents' trucks by sneaking it without their consent and then driving it straight into a cliff (accidentally or course, I was 14 then and was unaware that driving a right-handed vehicle required a different set of driving skills) making the truck roll over 6 times, and oh and did I mention that I was with my brother who was then only 8? Thank God no one was hurt.

Being the troublemaker that I once was, I got punished and chastised quite often. I'm sure you get the picture.

My parents had very different views on discipline though. My Mom belonged to the 'lumuhod ka sa bigas' school of discipline where one is supposed to kneel on rice grains for hours on end with arms extended to one's sides with either 2 massive telephone directories or an encyclopedia on each hand. My Dad, on the other hand, belonged to the 'evangelize, moralize, sermonize' school of discipline. Up to this day, he'd probably bombard me with sermons if he recalls the number of times he was summoned to the Principal's office.

Among the most vivid sermons I remember (although back then I pretended not to listen) are the ones on accountability. Take for example the difference between asking for consent and stating plans.

Say there's a huge party I want to attend, I could either say - 'There's a party at whoever's house, can I go? Pretty please.' VS. 'I'm attending a party at whoever's house tonight so don't wait up.' Or - 'May I use the car tonight?' VS. 'I'm gonna use the car tonight.'.

The former is a question and the latter is a statement. The former shows respect for authority and the latter shows utter disregard for it.

But what if the damage has been done - say for example a huge dimple slightly bigger than a halved orange right above the car's front tire or perhaps a ginormous scratch on the side of the car extending from the second door all the way to the rear bumper - do I fess up immediately or do I wait for anybody to notice?

For obvious reasons, I'd go with the former. For one, I don't think anybody would be that stupid not to notice. Second, I'd rather he hear it straight from the horse's mouth than from another source. And lastly, well, I've found that the imposed castigation is worse with the latter.

I'm not proud of my mistakes but I do own up to them and I do make an effort to pay for them. At least that's what I was taught, but then again I can only speak for myself. So what the hell are you gonna do about THAT? Huh.........

Emotional Vampires

Just when you thought vampires only existed in fictitious narratives and horror flicks, think again.

I find that there are three kinds of complainers, whiners, grumblers and/or faultfinders in this world, or in mine at least.

There are those who complain because they're looking for a solution to their hornets' nest in the process. That to me, is perfectly fine.

There are those who grump about their dissatisfactions and resentments because they want to let it all out, more like a form of release. Which again is perfectly okay just as long as the griper doesn't do it often. While I'm at it, I may as well admit that I belong to this category.

There are those who consatantly whine simply to elicit sympathy or more likely, attention. In Filipino, I think the term for this is reklamador or most probably KSP. Among the three, I find the latter the most annoying kind. For one, they whine, complain, and grouch over the same old things but you'll be amazed that they do nothing to solve anything. They whine about the same things over and over and over again. Even when given expedient advice, solicited or otherwise, you'll find they have absolutely no intention of solving anything.

In your quest to become a good listener, you'll find yourself
(a) drained of every positive human emotion such as joy, happiness, and love;
(b) worn-out of virtues such as faith and hope; and
(c) with thoughts filled with doubt and negativity, sometimes leaving you in a state of coma.

Much like Dracula, they can pretty much suck the life out of you.

I used to be a magnet for the third kind but growing older (not necessarily wiser) I've managed to identify them. In the process, I've managed to sever ties, even those formed by blood.

Doing so is not without recoil though. Erstwhile friends think I'm a major bitch. But then again, I truly am and I make no apologies for that.

Estranged relatives think I'm an ingrate. Come to think of it, I owe them nothing and I really care not what they think of me.

My dear friend Vince used to tell me (but not anymore), 'Ivy, your biggest problems aren't even yours to begin with'. Truer words have never been spoken.

Now I'm left with my sanity and a handful of silver bullets for validation.

Holiday Anathema

The Christmas season isn't exactly my favorite time of the year. For starters, it's so darn commercialized. I'm not being scrooge-ish but seriously, how on earth can one do some serious soul-searching amid all the parties, events, presents, food, alcohol, sweets, and traffic?

A strong case in point would be an incident just 2 days ago. Joel and I decided to do some last minute Christmas shopping sans the kids at Trinoma. We anticipated the traffic and the huge crowds hence we went as soon as it opened.

By 11 A.M., we were starved and decided to have our lunch early. Due to opposing tastes, we had to go our separate ways. I ordered take-out from Taco Bell, and he ordered his lunch to go from his favorite steakhouse. We decided to meet at the food court.

I got there first and got the best banquet seat in the house. Since he was taking too long, I started nibbling away. Just then, a mom, her daughter (about 6 or 7), and her yaya (local term for nursemaid or nanny) approached me and asked if I was with someone so I said yes. Minutes later, they went back and asked me the same question. I, of course, gave the same answer.

I wouldn't have mind having them but there were about a hundred vacant tables in the food court. The kid throws me a piercing glance followed by a huge tantrum then started yelling at her mom and threatened that if she cannot sit there, she's not eating at all.

I remain unfazed amid all the drama. I'm not moving my fat ass for some spoiled rotten kid.

Joel arrives and little miss spoiled brat decides to shut up. The mom-in-despair, the spoiled rotten kid, and the dumbfounded yaya then settle for a table near ours. The spoiled little beast throws me piercing glances every now and then while showing off her new Winx and Bratz dolls to her yaya.

I swear I wanted to gouge her eyes out. Joel calms me by telling me that she isn't my problem, she's her mother's problem. Which is so true making the brat in me shut up.

I've always believed that the spoiled breed is 'made' and not 'born'. No baby is born spoiled. Spoiled rottenness is not innate.

Bringing up and rearing children is a huge responsibility and to a point, a major obligation that all parents should commit themselves to upholding.

I may not be the perfect mother but one thing I'm most definitely proud of is that my boys are far from spoiled brats. They are the most amazing creatures on the planet and of that, I'm quite certain (proud mama ).

Nonetheless it's still the season to be jolly so in keeping with the times and so as not to wreck my sons' super festive mood, I'm desperately trying to keep a smile on my already wrinkled face.

Christmas has somehow lost its true essence amid all the material indulgences we employ to celebrate it.

I'm still going with the scientific theory that the Lord was born sometime in the summer because apparently there was no hay in December in Nazareth.

I can't wait till it's REALLY 'Christ'mas.

Disambiguated Seity

If you were thrown the perennial identity question 'Who am I? Why am I here?', how would you answer?

Frankly, other than stating your name, would YOU even know where to start, much less respond?

Having no concept of selfhood, do you think your identity is either diachronic, synchronic, or both? Hell, I have no idea.

John Locke, a 17th-century English philosopher (not Terry O'Quinn's character in 'Lost'), stated that personal identity is founded on consciousness, and not the substance of either the soul or the body.

That said, how on earth will I ever come up with a de rigueur answer. Here's an attempt.

I am not always be kind but that does not mean I am wicked.
I may not be sympathetic but that does not mean I am not empathic.
I am not righteous but I'm awfully certain I am honest.
I am sometimes sarcastic but I am definitely not high-and-mighty.
I may not be enlightened but I'm positive I'm sharp-witted.
I strive to give of myself but that does not imply I am noble.
I sometimes strive for gain but that does not imply I am self-serving.
I sometimes feign indifference but I am not stoic.
I sometimes find my tongue staggering without purpose but in no way does that suggest I am undiplomatic.

I may not always be sure of who I am, but I'm extremely certain of who I'm not. After all, I am human. Created by The Supreme Being. Of flesh and blood. Of body and soul. Of mind and spirit. Powered by the divine spark, the elan vital.

To quote myself, 'Your reputation may be established, even fabricated by somebody else. But in the end, your character is something you build up for yourself.'

You can walk through life posing as a lamb whilst bitch-slapping everyone behind their backs. As for me, I'd rather be an in-your-face bitch than a hypocrite in denial.

In the words of Truman Capote, 'But without such misjudgements and such faiths, the seas would sleep, the eternal snows remain untracked.'

So now tell me, who are you? Do you know?

Of Sex Scandals & Pinays

I could go on 'tagging' people for the next 2 weeks but I'm a teensy bit scared of looking like a stalker as I'd probably be tagging the same set of folks. That said, I'll probabaly resume my 'stalking' in the coming days.

I've managed to be in a festive mood this past week because of all the wondefrul blessings in the form of wonderful acquaintances, heartwarming comments, and surprising memes. Today though, I'll let loose the inner bitch in me.

In light of the recent 'Pinay Scandals', I've pledged (a few days ago) to write something in support of the campaign spearheaded by some fellow Pinoy bloggers. It's been 3 days and I still honestly don't know what to say.

I'm not skeptical about the whole thing, heck I even signed up for it. But come to think of it, it's all a matter of perception.

First off, people who 'google' the words 'Pinay Scandal' over the net are looking for the exact same thing. Pinays. Scandals. Obscenities. To put it bluntly, SEX. I even googled the word 'Pinay', and a website promoting exotic and young Pinays and Asians was the first of 3,350,000 results.

In this day and age, when a 6 year old (maybe even younger) has internet access and even a monkey can be taught to operate a computer, what control do we have over other people's perceptions about us?

I once wrote an article in support (and to straighten a few misconceptions) of a foreigner's view of the Philippines. He was bashed for sharing his impressions and sentiments regarding our beloved country hence I offered my take. Now, after almost 3 moths in blogosphere, I've learned to lighten up. Everyone is entitled to their opinion. No one should be immune to that.

We've already entered the digital age. And along with all the advancements, there will always be drawbacks. To some people, the internet is a huge part of their business or craft. There are a lot of people making a living out of it. To others, it is a diversion from life's trivialities. But to a number of people, THIS is their reality. Maybe even their whole life if you will.

As long as there are people willing to sell themselves through their pictures, sex videos, and by joining sex chats, there will always be predators willing to foot the bill. I cannot even call the former 'prey' as there are sometimes 'willing victims'. Don't get me wrong here, I'm talking strictly of consenting adults. Minors and young children are another issue.

I was asked in one of the blog communities what the word 'Pinay' meant since my blog is aptly described 'Chronicles of A Pinay Dreamer'. I answered 'I am a Filipina. I was born and bred in the Philippines'. Whenever we travel outside the country, I'm frequently asked about my race. Some think I'm Korean, some would ask if I'm part Chinese, others ask if I'm Thai. My father is part Chinese hence my 'Chinese eyes', but even then I've always considered myself 100% Filipino. A full-blooded Pinay. And I sure am proud of it.

My husband does not like the idea of me having my portrait on my blog. He says it'll strip me of mystery and to a certain degree, privacy. It was my choice to do so simply because I wish to seem more 'humane', somewhat tangible. I can post photoshop(ed) images of myself and edit it make myself look 'perfect', but that would be a misinterpretaion, an utter lie. Instead, I chose to share my battle scars because I am, after all, a mere mortal. Flawed, imperfect, and wanting.

I've been devoid of sleep since I started my blog a little less than 3 months ago. I've even turned down Joel's offer to bring me to Batangas (plus he'll foot the bill too lol) to wakeboard, quite a number of times already. And to top it all off, I'm not even getting paid to do this BUT it is my choice to go on. In all honesty, I prefer 'pro bono' blogging to maintain my uncompromisable predisposition.

At the end of the day, it all boils down to choice. I've used this passage before but I'd gladly use it again.

Ad libitum.
A plaisir.
A piacere.

At will.
At pleasure.
At discretion.

In the same way that I can choose my path, there will be others who can and will choose theirs. Matters such as these transcend race, religon, age, even gender.

Perception is also subjective. Your reputation may be established, even fabricated by somebody else. But in the end, your character is something you build up for yourself.

This, after all, is the internet. Where genuine people are rare. Where (cyber) sex comes cheap and easy. Where the imaginary is confused with reality. And where everyone is free to do or say as they please.

That said, I'm going back to the real world (for a while). Where politicians are corrupt. Where war is cliche. Where AIDS and cancer have no known cure. And where 2 little angels are tugging at my shirt as they ask for their dinner.

Shiver Me Timbers: Drastic Measures (Part Two)

No, I did not shave myself bald a la Britney. I merely had a haircut. It's just a bunch of dead cells, right? So what's the big f***ing deal? Why so overly dramatic? With much preamble, here's the explication.

I'm pretty much a self-proclaimed daredevil. I've always been adventurous, even reckless to a degree. I'm very much into extreme sports. I have 2 tattoos and 4 piercings. I even once squished horse manure with my bare hands on a dare. I'm that deranged.

I'm pretty much up for (almost) anything except when it comes to my locks. It's the length I'm quite anal about. I've always believed that a woman's hair can be her crowning glory or the bane of her existence. Over the years, I've been a brunette, redhead, even (near) blonde. I sometimes have it dyed jet black, and at one point, dark blue.

For nearly two decades though, I've managed to keep it at a certain length. The shortest being up to my armpits, and the longest, waist length. In the early 90's, when Demi Moore (in Ghost) made it uber cool to sport short hair, I wanted to be 'in' and get the same cut. I begged my mother to allow me to have my lock sheared. Her response being, 'If you seriously want your face to look like a huge siopao (steamed bun), by all means get that haircut'. I never asked again.

I couldn't possibly blame her as I was then extremely overweight. She would've been right. I considered keeping it long in homage of her as she has worn hers for nearly her entire life.

Since Rihanna came out with her 'Umbrella' music video many months back, Joel has been constantly bugging me to duplicate the cut. To please him, I went to the salon and just when the stylist was about to shear them, I changed my mind and got a coloring instead. To his dismay, I went home a (near) blonde. A few weeks later, I asked a sister to tag along for moral support. She ended up getting a makeover. Another few weeks pass, and with the intention of having it done (this time), I'm at it again. I went home with a Brazilian (if you have no idea what that is, then goood for you lol). Last week, Joel escorted me. Still, my hair remained untouched.

So why do it now when practically everyone, from Rihanna to Posh, Katie Holmes, even (our local) La Greta is sporting the same cut? I'm certain that by time you get to this part, you'd have no doubt that it wasn't a frivolous decision.

I was really upset the day I wrote Hyperspeed. I even considered putting an end to my blog. For some reason, the ghost of an ex-alter ego that I thought I've managed to exorcise over the past decade reappears on my site. Just when I thought I've mastered the art of forgiving and forgetting, I turned acerbic as 'it' managed to leave me a message.

I felt rage (just that honey, don't flatter yourself) as the memories resurface. Harry & Joan Mier once said, There are times when forgetting can be just as important as remembering - and even more difficult. So true.

In doing something I never thought I'd be willing to do, I was able to vanquish my negativity. Seeing a part of me cut off was like crushing those lousy sensations.

Only now can I truly say that I did hit the mark with my exorcising. And I feel so much lighter too.In hindsight, I know I did it for myself and nobody else.

Hyperspeed

A journey of a thousand sites begins with a single click.
Unknown

The internet is probably one of technology's greatest wonders. With just one click you can find just about anything. You can even google just about anyone with various search engines. And in a matter of seconds, find whatever or whomever it is you're looking for.

Before I started my blog, I only surfed the net for maybe 30 minutes to an hour a day tops. The only sites I frequented were Yahoo (to check my emails), and Eluxury (for purse shopping lol). Now, I spend most of my waking hours in front of a computer and am practically devoid of sleep.

Esther Dyson once said, 'The internet is like alcohol in some sense. It accentuates what you would do anyway. If you want to be a loner, you can be more alone. If you want to connect, it makes it easier to connect'.

I used to wakeboard (especially during the summer) up to 4 times a week. I only skipped wakeboarding for a few months to pay for my Balenciagas. Now that I'm finally free from my self-imposed purse ban, I find myself with a new addiction. I used to jump with glee everytime we would go to Batangas or Tagaytay. Now, Joel sometimes has to drag me to go there. He says he loves seeing me far from a computer. At home, I'm lucky to get more than 3 hours of shut-eye. Far from a PC, I stay in slumberland for 13 hours straight.

I've mentioned in a previous post that among the reasons I started this blog is to reach out to family and friends. One of the consolations being finding a very dear, long, lost bud (Hey Filip, see you in a month :) ).

Of late, I did sign up for a multiply account for my dear friend Filip as Flickr is blocked from the country (or building) she's in right now. Beyond that, I am quite satisfied with my blog and my photo host.

I do not have a friendster account. Joel signed up only recently. I, however, do not wish to ever have one. No matter how open I seem to be, there are still parts of my life I wish to keep private.

There are some people whom I wish to forget. Like my former English teacher in high school (whom I seriously wish were obsolete) who stole my essay, and without my consent gave it to another student and used it to enter an oratorical competition. I only found out after the announcement that they won and the piece was recited onstage (may the rot in inferno).

I may not have had the perfect childhood but one feeling I could distinctly reminisce is the feeling of innocence. There were no cellphones and text messaging was literally unheard of, but I felt but I felt much more connected. YM and chatting were (probably) inexistent, yet I then felt much more sheltered.

The internet has made life so much faster, at hyperspeed, if you ask me.

To a certain degree, maybe it is a form of anarchy. There are no rules here. There is practically no authority. No way of screening or filtering. In this world, censorship is a defect. To a point, chaos.

Among my favorite bible quotes (which I think I've quoted twice over) is from Matthew 16: 26, "And what do you benefit if you gain the whole world but to lose your own soul? Is anything worth more than your soul?"

In the end, you really have to ask yourself, 'Is it really worth it?'.

Only when I find an unimpeachable justification, then I'll get back to you.

Denouncing Suffrage

The first time I voted was in 1998. It was also the last.

The voting precint is right next to where we live so I don't think it's an inconvenience.

Sloth is a sin I don't think I've ever been guilty of. Just take a look at the number of posts I did in the last 2 months and I assure you, you cannot accuse me of being lazy.

So why, oh why, denounce a right that so many suffragettes fought for???

Philippine politics, in my humble opinion, is in a state of decadence. Sheer and utter decay. Public service turned into self service. What should be a noble profession is merely a business transaction.

Let me start with the candidates. Take your pick - celebrities, ex-matinee idols, ex-burlesque queens, boxers, retired basketball players, and my favorite category - the next of kin - the husband, the son, the daughter, the son-in-law, the daughter-in-law, heck even the grandchild of the incumbent want their share of power. Kamag-anak Inc. There is only a handful of sincere candidates out there (less than 10, IMO).

Don't get me started on Pork Barrel. I've already written something on it on my The Philippines Through the Eyes of A Filipina post. In case you didn't read it, I'll say it again. The Pork Barrel A.K.A. Countrywide Development Fund (CDF) A.K.A. Priority Development Assistance Fund (PDAF) are funds given to members of the Senate and Congress. These are discretionary in nature so it is up to the senator or congressman to identify the projects that will be funded from these funds. Correct me if I'm wrong, senators get a whopping P 200 million (about $4.65 million USD) each, while the congressmen are allotted about P 70 million (about $1.62 million USD) each. Sheesh, I'm starting to sound like a broken record. So where, oh where does all the money go??? oink oink oink. Let me just give you an example, or better yet, I'll show you.................

Congressmen (esp. women) love building waiting sheds and plant boxes........Pardon my ignorance, but THAT, to me, looks more like a rubbish bin............. Again, I'm really, really ignorant, but..............

Hair & Makeup + Diamond earrings + Color Separation + Tarpaulin printing > GI pipes + scraps of plywoodIs it because it's way cheaper than building schools or spending on infrastructure??? Even if I add the cost of these monstrosities, I mean waiting sheds, I do not think this is worth millions in taxpayer's money............

Potholes galore.........Why not at least spend on that???
Just asking...........

What about the squatters in Metro Manila??? This happens to be right behind a huge goverment facility, and I'm not telling where.............. Did you notice the huge service drop??? Did you also notice that there is NOT A SINGLE ELECTRIC METER???!!!! No wonder our electirc bills continue to sky rocket............

Principles, my dears. Something I think every person should have, only a handful have, and (almost, I'm not saying all) no politician thinks he needs...............

Ramblings of A Hormonal Bitch

Or is it raving lunatic??? Or perimenstrual wretch??? You decide.......

Ramblings, at random.......

When I first started wakeboarding nearly 4 years ago, words I could use to describe the scene were 'tranquil', 'serene', and 'a place of solitude'. Now it seems more like a carnival. I do not, will not, and/or won't ever haul my fat ass 185 kilometers (one way) and waste precious gasoline to simply watch artistas, intyendes.........

I was skimming through a primer on women's rights when I stumbled upon an injustice, I mean injunction. Apparently (in my beloved country), if a woman is charged with adultery, she gets a 6-year jail sentence BUT if a man is caught keeping a mistress, he gets to face a maximum term of only 4 years. What the f***! We have so many women in congress right now, what the heck are they doing??? Their nails???

Can anybody tell me the male equivalent of the word 'bitch'? I can't seem to find any..........

Diabolical Idiosyncrasies

Thus in the beginning, the two mental aspects, which are twins
Mutually disclosed themselves in their thoughts, words and deeds,
The one as the better (of the two) and the other (as) the evil
The wise and the intelligent did choose correctly but the ignorant and unwise did not.
-Zarathushtra

I'm convinced that there is good and evil battling inside each of us, each struggling for the upper hand. Though in some, good emerges the victor, and sadly in some, evil emerges the winner.

If you don't believe this theory you're probably either
a. in denial
b. a saint
c. living under a rock
d. a hypocrite
e. an alien

Even in the story of Creation in the Old Testament, it is quite obvious that we are fated to be in the midst of opposing poles between good and evil. Remember the forbidden fruit? You know the rest. Hence, Paradise was lost. Forever.

I was never a religious person. I wish I was though, but I've always been a rebel. I went through a period in my life when I stopped believing in God. Total and complete disbelief. And it was at that low, low point in my that I found him.

Terry Anderson once said, "We come closest to God at our lowest moments. It is easy to hear God when you are stripped of pride and arrogance; when you have nothing to rely on except God. It's pretty painful to get to that point, but when you do, God's there."

Random acts of kindness never fail to amaze and inspire me. Random acts of cruelty evoke feelings of dejection and indignation in me. How can a human being plot against his own kind?

Adam and Eve were banished from Paradise. But there is one thing God left all of us with, FREE WILL. The freedom to make choices without His intervention.

Everyday there is a battle inside each of us.

Everyday we make our own choices.

Everyday we exercise free will.

EVIL may sometimes triumph. GOOD sometimes seems the underdog. But always remember, EVIL will never conquer.

I hope you've chosen your side. I hope you chose well.

P.S. I wrote this article this afternoon with the alleged bombers in the recent 'Glorietta Blast' in mind. Apparently, it turns out to be an 'accident'. Hence I had to edit everything including the title. I'm not trying to sound preachy, intyendes.......... Although I'm really not sold on the whole 'accident' theory. Guess we'll have to wait some more......

Highly Evolved Defense Mechanisms

Sometimes I wonder if there's something infinitely sardonic to preferring animals to people.

I like reptiles of all shapes and sizes. I like snakes. I like turtles. I'm sure you know by now.

Snakes I can identify with because of their solitude and terrorizing facade. Turtles because of their tough looking shell.

I've always loved seclusion. I've always managed to intimidate people I've just met by feigning indifference; by seeming antipatika, maldita, mataray, suplada.

I do not fear death, I said so recently.

Then what is it that would evoke fear in you, she asked.

Heights, I said to myself. But not really, because as soon as I get the chance, I will base jump off Malaysia's KL Tower.

Intimacy and decadence, I retorted.

I'm sure she wanted to ask why but she didn't. Maybe she thought I was being impassive.

Truman Capote once said, "When God hands you a gift, he also hands you a whip; and the whip is intended solely for self-flagellation".

I fear losing anybody I care about. I fear having my heart broken, as it has been many, many times. I fear losing my wit, sometimes even my sanity.

I got teased a lot in grade school because of my weight and my gap teeth. I would cry as soon as I got home. My father told me, "Never let words get to you. Remember, 'Sticks and stones may break my bones but words will never hurt me' ". Only then would I be appeased.

Why are tears, especially from a woman, always seen as a sign of weakness? I still cried though, but I did it behind closed doors.

I have a very high tolerance for bodily pain. Even the deepest lacerations cannot make me shed a tear. But the slightest cruelty in expression can make me sob.

These days, I don't cry very often. But when I do, it is out of anger.

That's probably what I love about the written word. I can edit it, I can even delete everything I just wrote. But something that is said, you can never take back.

All venomous snakes are capable of biting without injecting their venom into their victim. This is called a 'dry bite'. They do this to indimidate rather than waste their venom on a body much too large for them to eat.

Even non-venomous constrictors can deliver damaging bites.

In a turtle, the shell is there to make it extremely difficult for predators to inflict damage on their very sensitive interior.

As for me, I'm writing this shrouded in obscure madness. All by myself, but that does not mean I am lonely. I'm going back into my shell now.

Random Questions Answered & Paparazzo Shots: Take 2

I've just noticed that my posts lately have been bordering on either solemn and/or grim and/or serious.

I'm not a serious person.

For one thing, my husband thinks I'm a goofball, my sisters think I'm a lunatic, my brother thinks I'm senseless, my parents think I'm daft, even my own relatives think I'm possessed.

I'm the type who always trips, falls off a bed, and/or trips, slips and falls flat on her back at E.K. To prove that I am indeed the opposite of serious, here are this week's paparazzo shots.......... No, hindi ako nag-iinarte, my eyebags are ginormous as I haven't had deep slumber in the last 2 weeks........Piss off!!!
O see, I'm not at all serious. My parents were right all along.


Questions, questions, questions.............

Here are my answers................

I've been asked many times whether I have background in writing. I've been writing grim tales (as in violent tales, murderous plots, and villainous schemes) in my diary since kindergarten, does that count? I was Literary Editor of my high school paper. I won a Rector's Literary Award in UST during my freshman year for scribing something about Ninoy Aquino. Pretty weird for someone who was then taking Fine Arts. Satisfied??? This is probably because I read a lot, which explains why I have no social life and I only have 2 friends total, which would explain why I have no friendster account. It would be pretty stupid of me to sign up for friendster when I am fully aware that I only have 2 friends. Sedira counts as 1 friend, so that would narrow down my friendster contact to only 1. I do not have multiply either, I have no plans of signing up, so stop inviting me. I do maintain a flickr account, if only to (a) promote my blog, (b) so that I only have to upload my photos once instead of uploading them again and again and again to send to all my relatives, and (c) well, wala lang. I am seriously backlogged in my traffic posts and my very own Shungak Awards. Why? My dear Tito Bennet instilled terror in me. How? By telling me not to use my camera especially at night because I might get into trouble since some fraternity members might just shoot me for aiming a camera at them. So I got to thinking, what the heck, death does not scare me, so I still kept shooting. Now I have dozens of photos to choose from. Among them are pics of policemen and soldiers with traffic violations. Of which you'll see in the next few days as I have something in mind to blog about tomorrow. Apparently, because of Joel's birthday, I've been a little self-restrained. But now that it's been nearly a week, I'm back to my old self. See, who ever said I was serious? mwahahaha

Conservation 101 for Dumdums

Joel's birthday is finally over. I've been raving for the most part of the week. Now I'm free to rant all I want. Matapos ang isang linggo ng pagtitimpi, handa na akong magpakawala ng galit. Umaalab at naglalagablab na galit.

In my quest to share my blog all across the world wide web, I join different blog communities. In one of the communities I posted a thread titled, 'Do snakes interest you?' That simple. To my surprise I receive a few comments such as...........

'I'm scared of snakes.... '

'I hate snakes.'

These comments I can take, I understand that not all people share my passion for serpents. The next one, however, managed to strike my nerves. Note that I did not edit anything out except for the name. These were his exact words:

'I'm with YOU, ----! Sheesh, I had a flickr widget on my blog with a Nature Group Pool and one day, after a year, I asked them, politely casually, not to include snakes in the Pool. Those amateur snappers went Bonkers. So nasty. I was so 'crushed' it took me an Entire 42 seconds to dump the bums and put up a Classy Group! They lost a TON of traffic --every day my readers clicked on those photos to look at their pics. Serves 'em right!
And most people don't know: snakes have salmonela on their gross skin. Easy to get sick touching those filthy things, but who would want to, you'd hafta look at 'em. YUCK. Totally Diz-gusting. (Geez, why did I read this...now I'm going to have a nightmare, sheesh.)'

To the dimwit who posted this on that particular site, first off, you misspelled salmonella. hahaha.

Second, HOW DARE YOU CALL THEM GROSS, FILTHY, AND DISGUSTING! Did you know that snakes play a very significant role in many ecosystems around the world. Saang planeta ka ba nakatira??? Snakes benefit humans by controlling rodent populations (hallur, ever heard of the bubonic plague??? tingin ko hindi, mwahaha). Even snake venom has been used to treat various diseases such as cancer, heart disease, and hemophilia.

Third, yes, I have heard that reptiles do carry some strains of salmonella. But so do amphibians, mammals, that includes us humans (o baka naman alien ka???). Even common house pets like dogs and cats. Chickens can even carry up to 2,000+ species of salmonella. Sources of salmonella include contaminated meat, improperly cooked meat, undercooked eggs, animal feces, even raw milk or certain fertilizers and animal feeds. It is probably associated with them because they do come into contact with their feces dahil hallur, hindi sila nakakalakad katulad mo. They can move in 4 different ways; rectilinear movement, serpentine movement, concertina movement, and sidewinding, notice walang 'walking' dahil wala naman silang legs (o baka hindi mo rin alam yon???). Correct me if I'm wrong [calling all herpetologists (as in scientists who study reptiles and amphibians, hindi sila manggagamot ng herpes baka kasi yun ang akala mo) please help me out here............], I once heard that there is a solution to getting salmonella from reptiles, hand washing and alcohol!! I hold (even kiss) Sedira a lot, but one thing I always do is to wash my hands afterwards. It's so easy to wash one's hands: water + soap + common sense lang yan, unless of course you lack the latter (turuan din kita maghugas ng kamay gusto mo???). You have more chances of getting the bacteria from improper food handling than you would from a reptile, intyendes?!!!

Fourth, ever heard of CONSERVATION????? Why the heck do you think Steve Irwin wrestled all those crocodiles??? Did you actually think he had nothing better to do??? Did you know that some 200 species of snakes are considered threatened or endangered? The biggest threat being habitat loss resulting from human activities like logging that causes deforestation. They are hunted for their beautiful skin which we humans turn into bags, belts, wallets, etc. In some countries, they are killed for their meat which is considered a delicacy. Others hunt them for their blood which is valued for its alleged pharmaceutical effect of warming the blood of the drinker. In fact, WE ARE A THREAT TO THEM AND NOT THE OTHER WAY AROUND. And FYI, snakes do not bite humans and are harmless unless provoked.

So unless you start taking an interest in their survival, snakes may find themselves banished from our planet. Unless you start caring, baka sa books o sa pictures mo nalang sila makita.

There a lot of things I still do not know about them. In fact, I only started reading about salmonella in reptiles when I heard Mr. Ignoramus Stupidus Maximus (ginawan pa kita ng scientific name.......bonggacious da va). There a lot of species I would love to learn more about, read about, and if I'm lucky, to hold and handle. But alas, I can only drool in envy as I watch reruns of the late Steve Irwin handle the most venomous species. Whenever I go to zoos, I head straight for the serpentarium as they never fail to mesmerize me. In case you didn't notice (my username alone screams snakes, black_mamba, duh), I LOVE SNAKES MORE THAN ANY OTHER ANIMAL ON THE PLANET!

So to the a**h*** who said that, next time you feel like saying anything bad about them, think again. Or better yet, start watching more Nat Geo or Animal Planet instead of watching Paris Hilton's porn videos. Or read more books instead of all those Playboy and Hustler magazines.


P.S. I will post pics of me & Sedira kissing, but later na as it is only 5 in the morning, I haven't brushed my teeth, baka mahimatay siya hahaha..............