Highly Evolved Defense Mechanisms

Sometimes I wonder if there's something infinitely sardonic to preferring animals to people.

I like reptiles of all shapes and sizes. I like snakes. I like turtles. I'm sure you know by now.

Snakes I can identify with because of their solitude and terrorizing facade. Turtles because of their tough looking shell.

I've always loved seclusion. I've always managed to intimidate people I've just met by feigning indifference; by seeming antipatika, maldita, mataray, suplada.

I do not fear death, I said so recently.

Then what is it that would evoke fear in you, she asked.

Heights, I said to myself. But not really, because as soon as I get the chance, I will base jump off Malaysia's KL Tower.

Intimacy and decadence, I retorted.

I'm sure she wanted to ask why but she didn't. Maybe she thought I was being impassive.

Truman Capote once said, "When God hands you a gift, he also hands you a whip; and the whip is intended solely for self-flagellation".

I fear losing anybody I care about. I fear having my heart broken, as it has been many, many times. I fear losing my wit, sometimes even my sanity.

I got teased a lot in grade school because of my weight and my gap teeth. I would cry as soon as I got home. My father told me, "Never let words get to you. Remember, 'Sticks and stones may break my bones but words will never hurt me' ". Only then would I be appeased.

Why are tears, especially from a woman, always seen as a sign of weakness? I still cried though, but I did it behind closed doors.

I have a very high tolerance for bodily pain. Even the deepest lacerations cannot make me shed a tear. But the slightest cruelty in expression can make me sob.

These days, I don't cry very often. But when I do, it is out of anger.

That's probably what I love about the written word. I can edit it, I can even delete everything I just wrote. But something that is said, you can never take back.

All venomous snakes are capable of biting without injecting their venom into their victim. This is called a 'dry bite'. They do this to indimidate rather than waste their venom on a body much too large for them to eat.

Even non-venomous constrictors can deliver damaging bites.

In a turtle, the shell is there to make it extremely difficult for predators to inflict damage on their very sensitive interior.

As for me, I'm writing this shrouded in obscure madness. All by myself, but that does not mean I am lonely. I'm going back into my shell now.

Conservation 101 for Dumdums

Joel's birthday is finally over. I've been raving for the most part of the week. Now I'm free to rant all I want. Matapos ang isang linggo ng pagtitimpi, handa na akong magpakawala ng galit. Umaalab at naglalagablab na galit.

In my quest to share my blog all across the world wide web, I join different blog communities. In one of the communities I posted a thread titled, 'Do snakes interest you?' That simple. To my surprise I receive a few comments such as...........

'I'm scared of snakes.... '

'I hate snakes.'

These comments I can take, I understand that not all people share my passion for serpents. The next one, however, managed to strike my nerves. Note that I did not edit anything out except for the name. These were his exact words:

'I'm with YOU, ----! Sheesh, I had a flickr widget on my blog with a Nature Group Pool and one day, after a year, I asked them, politely casually, not to include snakes in the Pool. Those amateur snappers went Bonkers. So nasty. I was so 'crushed' it took me an Entire 42 seconds to dump the bums and put up a Classy Group! They lost a TON of traffic --every day my readers clicked on those photos to look at their pics. Serves 'em right!
And most people don't know: snakes have salmonela on their gross skin. Easy to get sick touching those filthy things, but who would want to, you'd hafta look at 'em. YUCK. Totally Diz-gusting. (Geez, why did I read this...now I'm going to have a nightmare, sheesh.)'

To the dimwit who posted this on that particular site, first off, you misspelled salmonella. hahaha.

Second, HOW DARE YOU CALL THEM GROSS, FILTHY, AND DISGUSTING! Did you know that snakes play a very significant role in many ecosystems around the world. Saang planeta ka ba nakatira??? Snakes benefit humans by controlling rodent populations (hallur, ever heard of the bubonic plague??? tingin ko hindi, mwahaha). Even snake venom has been used to treat various diseases such as cancer, heart disease, and hemophilia.

Third, yes, I have heard that reptiles do carry some strains of salmonella. But so do amphibians, mammals, that includes us humans (o baka naman alien ka???). Even common house pets like dogs and cats. Chickens can even carry up to 2,000+ species of salmonella. Sources of salmonella include contaminated meat, improperly cooked meat, undercooked eggs, animal feces, even raw milk or certain fertilizers and animal feeds. It is probably associated with them because they do come into contact with their feces dahil hallur, hindi sila nakakalakad katulad mo. They can move in 4 different ways; rectilinear movement, serpentine movement, concertina movement, and sidewinding, notice walang 'walking' dahil wala naman silang legs (o baka hindi mo rin alam yon???). Correct me if I'm wrong [calling all herpetologists (as in scientists who study reptiles and amphibians, hindi sila manggagamot ng herpes baka kasi yun ang akala mo) please help me out here............], I once heard that there is a solution to getting salmonella from reptiles, hand washing and alcohol!! I hold (even kiss) Sedira a lot, but one thing I always do is to wash my hands afterwards. It's so easy to wash one's hands: water + soap + common sense lang yan, unless of course you lack the latter (turuan din kita maghugas ng kamay gusto mo???). You have more chances of getting the bacteria from improper food handling than you would from a reptile, intyendes?!!!

Fourth, ever heard of CONSERVATION????? Why the heck do you think Steve Irwin wrestled all those crocodiles??? Did you actually think he had nothing better to do??? Did you know that some 200 species of snakes are considered threatened or endangered? The biggest threat being habitat loss resulting from human activities like logging that causes deforestation. They are hunted for their beautiful skin which we humans turn into bags, belts, wallets, etc. In some countries, they are killed for their meat which is considered a delicacy. Others hunt them for their blood which is valued for its alleged pharmaceutical effect of warming the blood of the drinker. In fact, WE ARE A THREAT TO THEM AND NOT THE OTHER WAY AROUND. And FYI, snakes do not bite humans and are harmless unless provoked.

So unless you start taking an interest in their survival, snakes may find themselves banished from our planet. Unless you start caring, baka sa books o sa pictures mo nalang sila makita.

There a lot of things I still do not know about them. In fact, I only started reading about salmonella in reptiles when I heard Mr. Ignoramus Stupidus Maximus (ginawan pa kita ng scientific name.......bonggacious da va). There a lot of species I would love to learn more about, read about, and if I'm lucky, to hold and handle. But alas, I can only drool in envy as I watch reruns of the late Steve Irwin handle the most venomous species. Whenever I go to zoos, I head straight for the serpentarium as they never fail to mesmerize me. In case you didn't notice (my username alone screams snakes, black_mamba, duh), I LOVE SNAKES MORE THAN ANY OTHER ANIMAL ON THE PLANET!

So to the a**h*** who said that, next time you feel like saying anything bad about them, think again. Or better yet, start watching more Nat Geo or Animal Planet instead of watching Paris Hilton's porn videos. Or read more books instead of all those Playboy and Hustler magazines.


P.S. I will post pics of me & Sedira kissing, but later na as it is only 5 in the morning, I haven't brushed my teeth, baka mahimatay siya hahaha..............

More Sedira Facts

I'm really no authority on this but I'll try as best I can and know to help you know her more. Most info I've learned through books, the net, and through observation. There are a LOT of different snakes out there, and each has its own distinct characteristic and behavior. Last I looked, there are about 2,700 different species of snakes. Then there are subspecies pa, so I really don't know the exact figure. I'll focus on Sedira..............

ON COLOR
Hers is a transverse band of red, black, and yellow. This color mimics the coloration of highly poisonous coral snakes. Venomous coral snakes usually have a red, yellow, black pattern. If you see one, run for dear life..................

ON SNAKESKIN

Most people are surprised to find that her skin is smooth and dry instead of a slimy texture. Her skin is very elastic and the scales stretch apart when the she is swallowing and digesting large prey.

ON SKIN SHEDDING

The skin is usually shed in one piece, from the head down to the whole body, turning it inside out in the process. She sheds about once every 2 weeks although she did shed more often when she was younger.

ON EATING HABITS
She eats just once every week. Sometimes even once in 2 weeks. We've tried giving her more, she'll eat it but then she'll regurgitate it the next day.

ON WHAT WE HAVE IN COMMON
We are both solitary creatures. I can count my friends with one hand. My definition of 'gimmick' is simply going to the mall, and my definiton of 'good time' is wakeboarding. I don't like to party, neither does she.

ON COURTSHIP AND MATING

Sorry, very strict ang parents niya. She's still a virgin haha.

Meet My Baby Girl

Meet my baby girl, Sedira.

Common Name: Mexican Milk Snake

Scientific name: Lampropeltis triangulum annulata

Age: about 4 years old (I've had her since she was a baby, she's been with me for more than 3 years already)

Maximum Length: 1.2 m

Current Length: 1.0 m

Diet: Small warm blooded animals, lizards, and other snakes

Sedira's Diet: Strictly small rodents

Before I met Joel, I was never into animals. I thought they were a burden, expensive, messy and high maintenance. Apparently, his love for animals rubbed off on me. Since I'm asthmatic, I cannot handle furry creatures so I decided to stick with turtles. I used to have 5 red eared turtles. They were a bit messy and since I had to clean their terrarium every other day, I had these really bad rashes all over my hands and arms. But even then I wouldn't let them go. Joel wanted to get rid of them.

One day he tells me, "What animal can I get you that you'd agree to let them go?"

Kidding, I said "Ummm, since I was born in the year of the snake I want a snake. A real live one."

Less than a week later he comes home with her.

Ain't she a beauty???

Well, in case you haven't eaten I suggest you stop scrolling this page down as this is really graphic.

It's a good thing though that I was born in the year of the snake. Imagine if I was born in the year of the tiger. Or the dragon haha.